Google hideMe'>

The Blog

Body Love and Botticelli: How Ancient Art Gave Samantha (more of) the Power to Love Herself

Posted by on Mar 27, 2014 in Blog, Body Image | 1 comment

Body Love and Botticelli: How Ancient Art Gave Samantha (more of) the Power to Love Herself


When I was 18 years old, I lived in Beijing for six months. It was… epic. For a lot of reasons. Least of which being all the beer pong. The nudist protest I made in a Chinese bar. Hiking the Great Wall.

Okay, maybe the Great Wall goes first.


Beijing was also my first experience in a world class museum. The Beijing version of the MET had an entire exhibit devoted to medieval and rennaissance depictions of women…. and I fell in love.

Being slightly overweight, young, in college, and feeling badly about myself but not understanding the worlds of body image, sexism, disordered eating, and the like…. when I saw paintings that glorified bodies that looked less like American ideals… bodies that were softer, pudgier, rollier, versions of American ideals – I realized just how deeply beauty norms are conditioned by societal preferences.

I realized that my body was worthwhile.

I realized that American norms didn’t get to tell me if I was beautiful or not (neither do the Greek or Italian ones, of course.)

I fell in love with ancient art that muggy afternoon in Beijing.

One of our community members, Samantha Williams, who is a beautiful woman and poet and soul and fire – has reflected on the same experience to a remarkable degree. I asked her if she would be willing to write a short piece for our blog that discussed her transformation and relationship to the art, and this is what she delivered.

So Samantha….


“You could be a sister of the Graces,” my friend told me as we stood examining a print taken from Botticelli’s Venus and the Three Graces Presenting Gifts to a Young Woman.


body love and bot 1

Botticelli, detail from Venus and the Three Graces

body love and bot 2

Presenting Gifts to a Young Woman (1483-1486)


Although I could have deflected this compliment by mentioning numerous dissimilarities (for example, my face is much too round), instead I smiled and said, “Thank you.”  In general, my friend appreciates my appearance more than I do.  It is not my job to try to make his taste conform to mine.  Arguing would diminish his enjoyment and deprive me of the chance to bask in the glow of his sincere regard.


Sometimes it is easier to see myself as beautiful when I look through someone else’s eyes.


Intrigued by the figures in the painting, I went online the next day to learn more about the Graces, minor Greco-Roman goddesses of beauty, joy, and abundance.  My search for pictures of the mythical trio soon brought me to Botticelli’s Primavera.

body love and bot 3

Botticelli, detail from Primavera (c. 1482)

I admired the easy flow of the dancing Graces.  And I noticed their curves.

Then I moved on to other representations.  While the body types varied, it seemed obvious that in each case, the artist felt that the women he had portrayed were beautiful.

body love and bot 4


First-century fresco

body love and bot 5

Raphael, 1504-1505

 Italian fresco, c. 1519

body love and bot 6

Jacques Blanchard, Venus and the Three Graces Surprised by a Mortal (1631-1633)

body love and bot 7

Peter Paul Rubens, 1635

body love and bot 9

Carle van Loo, 1763

body love and bot 10

French painting, c. 1765

Jean-Baptiste Regnault, 1797-1798

 body love and bot 11

Antonio Canova, 1814-1817

My quick search for depictions of Venus, goddess of beauty and love, also began with Botticelli.


body love and bot 12

Botticelli, detail from Primavera (c. 1482)

body love and bot 13

Botticelli, The Birth of Venus (1486)


I was particularly drawn to Giorgione’s Sleeping Venus because the goddess’s face is similar to mine, and I have spent more time bemoaning my “fat cheeks” than complaining about any other body part.  Like many of the other portraits I found, this one illustrates that the six-pack is not the only abdominal ideal.


body love and bot 14

Giorgione, Sleeping Venus (c. 1510)


When I imagine myself among this company of beautiful women as another finely crafted showpiece in the human gallery, I want to treat my body with the love, respect, and care worthy of a work of art.


I suspect that these images of Venus and the Graces exercise their power not merely through the way they look, but also through the way they make the artist and the viewer feel.  The degree of appreciation is influenced by the attitudes of both the model and the perceiver.


When interacting with people or viewing pictures, we can apply a propensity to objectify, criticize, and find fault, or we can bring a disposition to accept, empathize, and celebrate.  I have noticed that my impressions of how my friends look are infused by my affection for them and by my memories of the times we have spent together.  I have come to associate their physical appearances with their characteristic traits of ability, intellect, and imagination.  Since paintings and sculptures often represent composite images created over multiple sittings with the goal of eliciting particular reflections and responses, such artworks may come closer than most photographs to approximating this deeply subjective dimension of human experience.


For me, exploring visions of beauty from other periods and places has reinforced the lesson that a woman who exudes vitality and delight can be attractive no matter what her shape.  We can all seek the beauty in others and share our unique graces with the world.


10 Signs You’re a Healthy Woman

Posted by on Mar 25, 2014 in Blog | 6 comments

10 Signs You’re a Healthy Woman


Much as I love empowerment, self-love, and confidence, I am going to pass out if I write another article about sex appeal this week. That stuff’s important, but only as one piece of the puzzle of what it means to be a whole, healthy woman.

What are some other signs that you are healthy – and as a woman, specifically?

What do you want to look for as signals of wellness?

Here are the most important:


1. If of reproductive age, you have a regular menstrual cycle.

The menstrual cycle is highly sensitive to fluctuations in health. Impaired gut health, inflammation, insulin resistance, physical stress and mental stress can all negatively impact your cycle and its regularity. If your cycle is irregular, you may want to investigate what may be causing it. An irregular cycle is a pretty clear signal that at least some thing is amiss in your body, even if the list of potential culprits is long.

2. Your period is relatively pain-free.

I will not guarantee you a painless menstrual cycle, no matter how healthy you are.

But if you are physiologically healthy, your period will never make you so sick you have to miss work or spend an entire day curled up in the foetal position with Love Actually. Common reasons for intense pain during a menstrual cycle are endometriosis – a condition of having endometrial tissue planted excessively throughout your abdominal cavity – and estrogen dominance. Endometriosis is associated with autoimmunity and immune system dysreulation, so an autoimmune protocol may be in order. Estrogen dominance is a result of being overweight, stress, inflammation, poor liver health, and birth control use.

High amounts of inflammation can also seriously impact your menstrual experience. Many women find that excessive sugar or a meal out at a restaurant leads to menstrual pain in the following days.

3. You do not go crazy once every month.

PMS is a sure sign that your neurotransmitters – the molecules that make up the bulk of your brain – are not quite working the way they should. In PMS, certain “feel good” chemicals such as serotonin and dopamine do not react well to the hormonal changes at the end of your menstrual cycle.

So both your hormones need to be balanced and your neurotransmitters need to be supported if you suffer PMS or PMDD (the more extreme form of PMS). Cooling inflammation, weight loss, focusing on omega 3s, exercise, eliminating grains, dairy, and sugar, and healthy animal protein are all great ways to do this.

4. You sleep well.

Women experience insomnia at much higher rates than men. This is largely because hormones influence everything in the body. Estrogen is necessary for moving magnesium into tissues, which helps your body shut off at night. So without proper hormone balance, you may have trouble falling and staying asleep.

Women are also highly sensitive to stress hormones. Cortisol – the primary stress hormone – is also responsible for wakefulness. So if you are under an undue amount of stress, that can show up in your sleeping patterns and wreak havoc all its own.

If you sleep well, this is a good sign that you are in decent hormone balance, have your stress within manageable ranges, produce the right amount of sleep hormones, and have healthy neurotransmitters.

5. You have regular bowel movements.

Constipation, diarrhea, and irregularity are all signs that something’s a bit off with your digestive processes. This is likely due to an impaired gut flora population (which often runs hand in hand with leaky gut). This is a crucial problem to address for many reasons. 1) Your comfort. 2) Your intestinal lining and a healthy immune system. 3) Keeping inflammation in check. And 4) Keeping estrogen levels healthy. Too little fiber and too much constipation makes your body re-absorb estrogen that it is trying to excrete, possibly making you estrogen dominant; and too much fiber and diarrhea on the other hand can do the very opposite.

6. You have clear skin.

This is a tough one for me. I have incredibly sensitive skin. Nonetheless, in the end I have nothing to be but grateful for this fact since my sensitivity makes me so attuned to small differences in my health. My cystic acne alerted me to my dairy and soy sensitivities. My keratosis pilaris (those red bumps commonly found on people’s arms) only flares up when I eat gluten, alerting me to some degree of sensitivity on that front. I break out when I am under even a small degree of stress.

And all of this is even more extreme because I had/have PCOS, one of the most common female hormone imbalances.

Your skin is littered with testosterone, estrogen, progesterone, DHEA-S, and other sex hormone receptors. Testosterone aggravates the skin and causes increased oil production, and estrogen soothes and softens your skin. If you experience cystic acne, particularly as it may fluctuate with your menstrual cycle, this is a clear sign that some sort of hormone balance is plaguing you.

7. You don’t have hair in male places, like around your mouth, and you aren’t balding where men do, like on the top of your head.

Male-pattern hair growth and hair loss is a clear sign of hormone imbalance. When your hormone profile matches a man’s — primarily via testosterone excess — you will develop hair growth patterns like a man’s.

8. You have a libido.

Libido is not just a side benefit of being a woman. It’s an important marker of health. Hormone imbalance – in both the cases when estrogen levels are too high and when male sex hormone levels like testosterone are too high – will often precipitously endanger your sex drive. Stress and poor sleep also derail libido. As does poor psychological health regarding sex.

If your libido is raging, ten stars for you. If you struggle with it, consider working on issues of hormone balance, reducing stress, and creating the safest sexual environment possible.

9 You have energy both before and after you exercise.

You shouldn’t have to force a workout. If you have the right amount of energy, (and if you are appropriately listening to your body!), exercise should feel good and fun. You also shouldn’t be so fatigued afterward. If you have energy both before and after you exercise, this is a good sign that your body is not over-taxed, that your stress hormones are in manageable levels, and that your body is on board with your current lifestyle.

9.5 You have energy. Period.

Way, way, way too many women are chronically fatigued. From stress hormone excess to poor sleep to hypothyroidism, it is incredibly easy for women’s lives to slip away into brain fog. If you are chronically fatigued, consider nutrient deficiencies, stress, inadequate sleep, too low carbohydrate or fat intake, too low calorie intake, blood sugar fluctuations and hypothyroidism as possible culprits. Hypothyroidism is particularly important for women since the vast majority of hypothyroid cases occur in women. The thyroid gland is highly sensitive to pituitary and stress hormone activity, both of which we know are crucial and highly influential aspects of women’s health.

10. Maintaining a healthy weight isn’t impossible.

Women have a harder time losing and maintaining a “healthy” weight than men. Why? Hormones, of course. For one, the female body is highly sensitive to starvation signals, so if you over-do it in terms of calorie restriction or exercise over a long period of time, your body may rebel by decreasing its fat-burning rate. For another, if you are on birth control or your estrogen levels are at all elevated (due to inflammation, being overweight, stress, and the like), your estrogen levels may be encouraging weight storage and preventing you from losing weight. If you are menopausal, you may struggle with weight maintenance because your estrogen levels are too low (counter-intuitive, I know), and you need at least a little bit of estrogen in order to store fat properly.

Also, the female body just so happens to usually really love having some fat on it, so give it a hug. Don’t try to starve it away.


All of which and more in the seminal guide to women’s health, Sexy by Nature, @ Amazon and in stores now!


9 Steps to Invincible Partnership with Your Body

Posted by on Mar 20, 2014 in Blog, Body Image, Disordered Eating, Feminism | 0 comments

9 Steps to Invincible Partnership with Your Body

First, let me say: thank you, community. After just 24 hours on Amazon shelves, Sexy by Nature was already #1 in one of it’s listed categories, “whole foods.” I couldn’t do this without you. Your love and support is incredible, and as I drove east from Detroit to Boston yesterday all I could think about was how much I wanted to hug all of you all of the time.

If you’ve got a copy, I hope you love it, and I hope you’ll let me know what you think. I’m watching all the relevant review sites like a hawk, ready for your honest stars (I don’t even need five, I promise. Just honest ones.) (No, give me five, okay?)

Just kidding…

Seriously, though.

So it gives me even more joy to bring to you one of the best, practical, empowering, and did I say best? posts that I think I’ve ever written. It’s up at George Bryant’s (the civilized caveman of giveaway and incredible recipes and big time LOVE fame) blog.

It’s called “9 Steps to Invincible Partnership with Your Body.”

The 9 steps?

1. Surround Yourself with the Love You Deserve

2. Deconstruct Negative Thoughts About Yourself

3. Contextualize

4. Get on your Body’s Side

5. Accept!

6. Forgive!

7. Appreciate!

8. Go to the Mattresses!

and (of course – because you know me well enough by now) 9. Strut!

(except George likes to use more exclamation points, as you’ll see in the post :) )


So check it out! This list is NOT in Sexy by Nature - much as I wish it were. Nor is it anywhere else, really. You might want to check out the “10 Reasons to Love Your Body” VLOG, which is similar, but that’s as close as I get anywhere on the internet to telling you how to have a good relationship with your body.

Read. Here. It’s awesome.

Then make George’s banana bread. Even more awesome.


10 Reasons I am a Sexy Woman: A Celebration of Sexy by Nature’s Release Today!

Posted by on Mar 18, 2014 in Blog, Sexy by Nature | 3 comments

10 Reasons I am a Sexy Woman: A Celebration of Sexy by Nature’s Release Today!


LADIES! Today is the day!

Cut the ribbon! Loose the sails! Get ready, on your mark…


Sexy by Nature is on shelves and we are going to do some hella powerful things for women all over the world.

Haven’t ordered it yet? No worries! It’s available on Amazon - though it’s current 27 percent off sale will only last as long as the Amazon gods permit.

(If you happen to have your hands on a copy or simply want to jump the gun, reviews @ the page @ Amazon are  the most important thing we can do as a community to help convince the book gods that this is one worthy of attention…. and I am almost certain that it is. :) )

Not convinced it’s a good buy? Check out early reviews byJason Seib (“Stefani is a voice of reason in what sometimes feels like a desert of books offering “just another diet”) Heather Spergel  (“I was hugging the book to my chest in appreciation”) and Kaila Prins (“I think this might be the first and last nutrition book you’ll ever need.”)

And to be a showy ass for just another second or two, Taylor Ritzel, 2012 Gold Medalist, calls me a genius on the back cover, and Robb, “one of the fiercest and most learned advocates of women’s health.”

Want to read a bit more about it? Check out a Q&A here or read most of the introduction here.

See a video preview? Here.

A guy? Trust me, you can still love the shit out of this book.


SO. In celebration this is so joyous event, I am going to share with you ten reasons I am a sexy human being.

Sexy by Nature is all about physical healing tools – overcoming acne, infertility, thyroid issues, adrenal fatigue, hormone imbalance, menopause symptoms, and more – but it is also about psychological healing tools. You need not just the right foods, but you need to relate to the foods and to your body in the healthiest way possible.
Sexy by Nature is all about sexiness. It’s about the place that being sexy has in your life, and how you can change your thoughts about sexiness and yourself in order to become a more physically and psychologically well human being.

In Sexy by Nature, I define being sexy as “an attitude.”

As “empowerment.”

And as “excitement to be in the skin you’re in.”

Sexiness isn’t an hourglass figure. It isn’t a measurement. It isn’t a dress size. Because none of those things say a damn lick about how you feel in your own skin as a natural body, about how excited you are to be you and to be on a journey to greater health and wellness.

Sexiness is about being a woman who is alive and who is embodied in her own self. It’s about being someone true to her self, someone who is free to love herself and the world because she is a forgiving, compassionate, proud ally of her body and its needs.



1) I used to pinch my abdominal fat every morning first thing when I woke up, and now I don’t do it as often.

2) I believe in the powers of courage and love and challenge myself to live more fully into them every day.

3) I am a dancer.

4) I have passion and excitement for living life beautifully and meaningfully and try to share it with people.

5) I try really, really hard to be a good person, even though I am so incredibly far from where I’d like to be.

6) I appreciate what is female about my body and what my body needs in order to be healthy – so I feed her when she is hungry and stop when she is full. I am not at war with my body. I do my best to listen, and am her partner.

7) I am a super super super nerd – the kind of nerd that is still nerdy enough to not be cool. I know the names of and can identify on sight all 150 of the original Pokemon. Oddish is obviously the cutest.

8) I recently “failed”  in life, big time. I do not hate myself for that fact. I don’t even hate the world that much. I am a human being.

9) And I am worthwhile.

I am worthwhile.

I am worthwhile.

10) And that is mostly why I am sexy. Because sexiness is a damnit-all-to-hell right, and I have rights.

Ihave accepted and come to love and take pride in being me, uniquely. I am worthy of sexual and romantic feelings, and for that I feel sexy… often.

And am sexy. Worthy of sexy. Worthy of confidence. Worthy of love.

I have learned to feel this way more and more over time.

And I really, very, so very much hope that you do, too.


What makes you a sexy woman? What do you think sexy is? Do you think it has more to do with what people think or with how you feel? All answers are awesome – I want your feedback and a discussion.

Thank you, ladies, for everything.




Candy Horvath!

Congratulations, Candy!!!!


Don’t forget – book’s on Amazon! And leave a review whenever you’re ready!

amazon logo

sbn facebook page square no stem click here to join excerpts etc blue and black centered saturated new font

Announcing!: Sexy by Nature’s 27 percent off – and the Sexy by Nature Exclusive Community Page is Up and Running…and stuff.

Posted by on Mar 13, 2014 in Blog | 0 comments

Announcing!: Sexy by Nature’s 27 percent off – and the Sexy by Nature Exclusive Community Page is Up and Running…and stuff.


It has been a challenge for me to sort out what I want to do with this blog and with the forthcoming book. How much do I want them to intersect? I don’t know. Are they the same thing? I don’t know. Should I serve both communities at the same place? I don’t know. Every time I start thinking about these questions I get stuck and find myself watching the latest episode of Bones before I even knew what I am doing.

Needless to say, there has been a whole lot of David Boreanaz in my life.

Not like I’m complaining.


So I have decided, after much deliberation, to keep the Paleo for Women blog strictly as the Paleo for Women blog. Huzzah!


But then what to do with all the women in the Sexy by Nature community who also want to hang out and chat and get tips and share the latest nutritional and body image gossip?

Create a Facebook page, obviously.

sbn facebook page square no stem click here to join excerpts etc blue and black centered saturated new font

So thus we have the Sexy by Nature facebook page, which is where the bulk of the discussion about all things Sexy by Nature is currently in the process of migrating to.

For example, on the page, I recently posted three excerpts from the book – one each on each type of self-love I describe in the book – on the Facebook page – and at this page only. 

I describe physical self-love, non-physical self-love, and existential self love.

Physical love is about loving your body, and how to do it the right way and how to do it the wrong way.

….Because there are definitely wrong ways (ie, attachment to specific characteristics) and there are definitely right ways (ie, I love my body because it enables me to kick ass, a la the recent body love extravaganza we had at this site.)

Non-physical love is about appreciating all the things about yourself (the infinite things!) that are not physical, for example, how fearless you might be, or your sense of human.

Existential love is about the love of which you are worthy simply by being a human being. This self love is the bedrock of the other two. Without existential self-love, you cannot really forgive yourself as radically as you need to, nor love yourself as consistently.

So anyway. I talk about these things at the community page - – and will continue to share excerpts and tips and freebies and the like.




AND. Perhaps coolest of all - Sexy by Nature is up to #3 in both Women’s Sexual Health and Whole Foods categories on Amazon – and hasn’t even been released yet! So go ahead and give yourselves a pat on the back, kickass community. It is only because of you that word of our revolution has been able to spread at all.

Thank you, sincerely.

And go ahead and spread even more love because the book is on sale for 27 percent off ! – It’s going for $19.86 right now and the list price is $27.00 – so grab ‘em while you can!

Only the Amazon gods know how long the sale will last.


sexy by nature pre order 220 px 1 27 off




Since it comes out on Tuesday, if you order today you’ll get it in a week, guaranteed by Thursday the 20th!

Then you can leave a review on Amazon – like it, hate it, whatever – because I love you and I want to know what you think!

Two Shocking, Dehumanizing Reasons Runway Models are so Thin, and Why we Should Never Aspire to Look Like Them

Posted by on Mar 12, 2014 in Blog | 12 comments

Two Shocking, Dehumanizing Reasons Runway Models are so Thin, and Why we Should Never Aspire to Look Like Them

In 2006, after stepping off the runway in Montevideo, Uruguay, 22-year old model Luisel Ramos died of anorexia-related heart failure. The public was outraged, and they demanded that fashion executives re-evaluate their hiring practices.

Nonetheless we find today that it has been eight years and runway models are not getting any heavier or healthier. In fact, the average size and weight of models in the fashion industry is at an all-time low (even while the US Council of Fashion Designers instituted an 16 year old age limit in 2012). According to the British Association of Model Agents, the minimum height for a female should be 5’8, which the most acceptable range being 5’9-5’11. This woman should be approximately 115 pounds, and she should measure, bust to waist to hips, 34-24-34. At 5’9, this makes for a body mass index measurement of 17. 18.5 is where women become infertile and ill. 16 is where the WHO says it gets severely dangerous. 15 is where they often die.


A famous shot of Ramos before her death in 2006.

As a culture, we know this is unhealthy. We know that model extremity is one of many cogs in the complex gears of slender body image norms. We know none of it is right. Nonetheless we cannot seem to shake our attachment to extreme thinness.

Taking a good, hard look at the fashion industry reveals some powerful answers to the question of why models are so thin. These answers so powerful that they collapse whatever validity we had previously ascribed to thinness in the fashion world in the first place. They demonstrate that the fashion industry treats and depicts women as less-than human. Less-than-human is not valid. Less-than-human is not worth our attention and adoration. Less-than-human is something to reject and overcome, not something to aspire to.

These are two of the bizarre, harmful rules by which the fashion industry plays.

  1. Models are made to fit clothes; clothes are not made to fit models.

 The primary aim of fashion designers is to sell their product to retailers. This means that clothing is designed to drape and hang however it is most appeals to the human eye, no matter how drastic the body size its design requires. The longer, more flowy, or better draped an article of clothing is, the more likely a retail executive’s eyes will pop out of his head, and he’ll scramble to place thousands of orders. Krystle Kelley, a former model turned president of the Desert Models Agency, said of this phenomenon in an interview with Fox News that “people that pick up magazines are consumers. They want to see people that relate to them, which will make the consumer more eager to buy products. But designers are showing their garments to the majority crowd who are mostly retailers. The collections are also considered drafts, and those drafts are fitted to a mannequin that is size 0 or 2 dress size. The other concern of the designer is for the garments to flow as well as be mesmerizing on the catwalk and the way to accomplish that is for the dress, pants, gown etc. to be long. The only way to fit a long garment is with a model who is thin and tall.”

 Donna Karan New York - Runway - Fall 2013 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week

Image credit:

So clothing is designed for its own appealing shape, not for how it fits actual human beings. Models have often been called “hangers” for this precise reason. They are valued first and foremost as objects. They are useful for their measurements. They are bones and angles off of which clothing is meant to hang, not living, breathing, vibrant human beings.

This problem is best demonstrated by the role of the “fit model” in the fashion industry. The fit model maintains a precise, tiny shape that fits to exact measurements. This enables her to be the first mannequin in the production line, the tiny size—or the “skeleton” in the words of once Vogue Australia editor Kirstie Clements–off of which all of the larger sizes are modeled. Clements remarks in an excerpt from her book The Vogue Factor published in the Guardaint in July 2013  that one model described her roommate as “’[being] a fit model, so she is hospital on a drip a lot of the time.’” Executives in the industry often confide the same perilous status of their own models to Clements. Sometimes they even resort to strategically arranging a model’s limbs during a shoot because she is too starved and exhausted to move.


(Steffie Soede. Image credit:

After the design process, runway models must fit into these skeletal clothes. After that, the clothing is made available to the press to use for shoots. This forces the industry’s thinness norms down the throat of magazine editors and the popular presses (who nonetheless retain their own culpability in this process).

Models in the popular presses must fit into the sizes already produces: the fours, twos, or zeroes that come directly off the backs of women – hangers – on the runway. There are no bigger samples available, and it doesn’t matter much anyway, says Clement, since the industry knows that long, lean clothing sells, even if it will never drape off of a “normal” woman the way it does the fit model or a mannequin.

So models are so thin because they are hangers who are forced to squeeze themselves down to the size of pencil sketches. Models fit clothes; clothes don’t fit models.

2) Models disappear so clothing can shine.

Much as we might think of models as impossibly beautiful, they are not necessarily chosen for this fact. Yes, they must have a particular “ferocity” or “verve.” They must have the stage presence a designer is looking for. But if they were too beautiful or too buxom they would be distracting. Fashion executives fear that instead of focusing on the brilliant cut of a particular piece of clothing on a runway or in a fashion magazine, people would be drawn into lustful, envious thoughts of flesh. And they cannot possibly have that! Emmy Award-winning stylist and author David Zyla affirms this point in an interview with Fox News. According to Zyla, so much is at stake in runway shows that curvy, healthy, vibrant women would “upstage” a designer’s creations.  “As a result,” says Zyla, “the models chosen are typically slim and androgynous…so that audiences are not distracted by a curvy hip or full bosom.”


Image credit:

This is a particularly potent aspect of the fashion industry we need to think deeply about. Models are so slim, so young, so angular, and so often the antithesis of healthy body shapes because industry executives deliberately want them to be invisible. They are not chosen for sexual appeal. They are not chosen for their astounding womanhood or beauty. They are not chosen to be beacons of vibrancy or health. They are chosen for their potential to be a hanger…An object…something that is not seen. If that’s not reason to buck the fashion industry’s heavy-handed anorexia-mongering, I don’t know what is.

 adriana lima 2

(Adriana Lima, VS fashion show 2013. Image credit

Of course, many of the female bodies we idolize in popular culture such as Victoria’s Secret models are not at risk of death by anorexia nervosa, but nevertheless the fashion industry is problematic because its drastic aesthetic preferences perpetuate the myth of leanness as a necessary component of beauty far and wide. The fashion industry is partly why even the curvier Victoria’s Secret models are themselves still so tall and thin. The fashion industry is partly why mannequins are so tall and thin. The fashion industry is partly why women and girls flip through magazines and develop negative body images issues and disordered eating behaviors. Extreme thinness is not a standard of beauty for the ages. It’s not a norm founded in health and empowered womanhood. It’s not even a standard that treats women like human beings. It is arbitrary, and it is cruel. Recognizing this fact can help us move forward into the future thinking more realistically about what makes a woman beautiful,

I do not have all the answers on beauty. But I suspect it has something to do with health. I suspect it has something to do with personality. I suspect it has something to do with goodness. And I am certain it has something to do with dignity and inherent worth. These are not values the fashion industry offers–they are ones we must develop and stand up for ourselves. But we can do this with courage, forgiveness, and love, and with passionate indignance at the injustices perpetrated against women everywhere in the production of fashionable clothing.

59 Inspired Ways to Love your Body – Plus Read the Love Your Body Giveaway Winners!!

Posted by on Mar 11, 2014 in Blog | 1 comment

59 Inspired Ways to Love your Body – Plus Read the Love Your Body Giveaway Winners!!


Last week, I revealed that I had signed and was planning to mail out five free pre-release copies of my forthcoming book Sexy by Nature (which, by the way, is 27 percent off on Amazon right now (!!)).

The contest? To complete the sentence “I love my body because…” and move me to laughter or tears.

What I did not think was that every single person would win the damn contest, because you moved me to tears throughout all fifty-nine responses that I received.

So I had to pick SIX winners (I managed to squeeze one more freebie from my publisher than I had originally asked for after I read all the entries). This was a ridiculous task, but I managed to do so by 1) uniqueness, and 2) some quirk or another here or there.  Plus Samantha wrote a poem which is incredible. The thing is - so many of you had similar stories! It’s amazing. What I learned from this exercise, other than how incredibly kick ass this community is – is that we are, more or less, all in the same boat.

We all have difficulties. We all have pain. We all have pasts littered with mistakes. We all have hate and doubt and uncertainty and fear. So many women responded talking about specific difficulties they have had – and I was moved by every single one of them.

Fibromyalgia. Cancer. Cutting. Self-hate. Starvation. Obesity. PCOS. Miscarriages. Infertility. Endometriosis. Depression. Anxiety. Common themes.

Other common themes include loving bodies because they are “ours.” Loving bodies because they give us children and love. Loving our bodies for what they enable us to do. Loving our bodies because they are our home, and because they are our teammates.

What we then also have, and with more certainty than I have ever known, is each other.

None of us are islands. We’ve got pain, but we’ve got love, too. We’ve got loneliness, but we’ve got camaraderie. We’ve got bruises, but we’ve got smiles, too.

So smile on, my radiant friends! Below are the five winners I chose (Congratulations, ladies! I will be in touch about your addresses momentarily), and then, in both a downloadable PDF form and in JPEGs in the content of this post, are all of your responses. Delight in each other’s love and strength. Learn from one another. Take solace. Take friendship. Take love and life.

Whoopah, ladies!

We are on the way!




“I love my body because it always tells the truth.”



“I love my body because it is not perfect, my body and I argue from time to time but we do try to work out the differences. I want to run in the snow and make snow men, my feet have not the strength. I want to dance in a club, my body cannot follow the beat. We have agreed to sit together and look at other people do the things we cannot, and enjoy the world differently, but with a smile. We, my beautiful body and I, are together no matter what and we will always love one another, and take care of one another. <3 “



“I love my body because I love me and my body is a part of me. It does not define who I am, but it does enable me to do more things that do help define who I am.”



“I love my body because it’s like my mother’s. And so even when she is gone, it will be the living testament of everything she gave me and everything she was.”



I love my body ’cause it is perfectly squishy
From my boobies to my tushy
It gets me where I wanna go
With hips that move to and fro
My body tells me what it needs
Like water and sleep and time for feeds
It can lift some heavy things
It has a beautiful voice that sings
Oh, body, how I love you so
I’m glad we’re friends, I hope you know



“I love my body

because it is

a canvas for creative self,

a unique expression of my personality,

a living record of my history,

a physical facilitator for each thought and act,

a vehicle for interfacing with the world

to cultivate connection and relationship,

an intricate and elegant

dance of genes and elements,

the earthly vessel of my soul,

a sacred temple,

a song of wonder,

and a gift and instrument of love.”



View and/or download “I love my body because” in PDF form.


In JPEGs for your easy consumption pleasure:

7893767-0 7893767-1 7893767-2 7893767-3 7893767-4 7893767-5 7893767-6 7893767-7 7893767-8 7893767-9


As always, ladies, don’t forget we’re only sale for now (only the Amazon gods know when the sale will end) for 27 percent off – to be delivered mid next week!


AND check out the Kindle Fire HDX giveaway (if you’re a Sexy by Nature reader all you have to do is click “yes I”m in!” @ here (!).

The South Asian Health Solution….Finally Tackling Natural Health with Diverse Ethnicities

Posted by on Mar 7, 2014 in Blog | 0 comments

The South Asian Health Solution….Finally Tackling Natural Health with Diverse Ethnicities


As a blogger of modest (modest) fame, I receive several books in the mail every month asking that I please review them for my blog. Many of them I am more than happy to because I have been looking forward to the release for a long time, as was the case with the recent reviews I wrote of Sarah Ballantyne’s The Paleo Approach and Liz Wolfe’s Eat the Yolks. Others I put on the list but sometimes do not manage to get to because there really are only 24 hours to a day, despite all the manipulations of E=mc2 I’ve tried in my brief 25 years.

Last week I recieved The South Asian Health Solution in the mail. It looks like a standard diet book. It reads like one. It is full of explanations of what happens in the body when good foods and bad foods are eaten, and its stocked heartily with delectable recipes. It’s an awesome book, and that’s good. I expect paleo health books to be awesome books. Especially when they are published by Mark Sisson. (This one is.)

But the thing is – this is not a standard diet book. This book is written specifically with the genetics and the cultural background of South Asian people – so primarily Indians – in mind.

This makes this a diet book that does something almost no other diet books do –

It reaches people beyond the white middle class. (While still being inclusive to all, and particularly good for those who have resistance to dietary change based on food preferences.)

To which I can say nothing but “Amen.


My own book – much as I do my best to write as inclusively as possible to all genders and identifications and ethnicities and sexual orientations and socioeconomic statuses — falls into the general category of paleo health books. Educated people read them. Mostly - though not all – white people read them. Middle and upper middle class people read them. It is written for people who sort of already fit within a certain cultural milieu. This is not a bad thing. It is just a thing.

The South Asian Health Solution has specific recommendations in it for how to “modify cultural traditions that lead to weight gain and disease.”

It provides tips for physicians who work with diverse populations to help them modify their diets — in every chapter.

This applies to south Asians but to other cultural groups as well.

It does so with both “advanced” and “beginner” explanations.

It has chapters devoted to women’s health (!!!).

It has chapters devoted to children’s health and raising families.

Because all of these things are crucial to convincing as many people as possible that this is easy and worth a go, and they are also quite helpful for reaching people who might not have ever encountered paleo and other trendy diets before. I cannot say for certain if this book will appeal to south Asians more strongly than others, or if other minority groups will be interested in this book. I am not a south Asian. I am not a minority. But I trust that Dr. Sinha knows a bit more about what he’s doing here than I could ever hope to.

So I am excited about this book for so many reasons. It’s a great diet book. It’s got women’s stuff and children’s stuff. It’s smart. It contains:

  • How to look beyond LDL to accurately interpret cholesterol, including a discussion of the 2013 cholesterol guidelines
  • Understanding key biometrics and lab results used to monitor health (what Dr. Sinha calls the “Metabolic 6-pack”)
  • How to modify cultural traditions that lead to weight gain and disease
  • Detailed nutrition advice and recipes that have helped patients and wellness clients from all backgrounds optimize body composition and reverse disease
  • Detailed exercise chapter with illustrations geared towards beginners and advanced exercisers (includes apps and tips for the most sedentary individuals)
  • How to effectively manage sleep, stress, and fatigue
  • Recommended high-tech tools and apps used successfully in the clinic and during corporate wellness programs
  • Dedicated chapters on women’s health: includes PCOS, healthy pregnancy and weight loss tips tailored specifically for women
  • Dedicated chapter on children’s health co-written with pediatrician, Dr. Shally Sinha (Dr. Sinha’s wife), which takes on pediatric obesity and common lifestyle issues in today’s infants, children, and teens
  • Dedicated chapter on premature aging and senior health
  • Each chapter ends with special advice for physicians/health professionals who struggle to engage diverse ethnic groups with lifestyle changes

Yet more than anything, I am excited about it doing real work that the paleo health world needs. After AHS 2012, I wrote a blog post about the lessons I learned and things I experienced there. I blogged that I became even more aware of how homogenous the paleo scene is. (Go to paleo fx in Austin this April… you’ll see what I mean.) There was even a talk there about traditional diets and helping people who eat them modify them to embrace more natural foods. I took it down because such a rabid debate sprang up on my site in its wake, and I was not interested in being party to anger any longer. (This was, also, and perhaps moreso, tied to my justified claims of sexism in the sphere.)

This is a big part of my dream. I want health for the whole world. Everybody deserves it. It’s hard when you don’t speak the language or know the culture, and it’s hard when you are an outsider. It’s not easy to breach those walls. No one wants to be a preacher, and everyone wants to be understood and understanding. But slowly this change is coming, and we have Dr. Sinha in large part for being a leader in this battle. It is made all the more incredible because he speaks to patients and to health professionals at the same time.

And sometimes, if you want to make change, you have to make it from the top down and the bottom up.

My hat’s off, and my enormously large gratitude and hugs are, to him and his team. Thank you.


For more on Dr. Sinha’s stuff, check out an interview on here and his philosophy and books and work here at his blog.


Enter TODAY to Win a Brand New Fully Stocked 32GB Kindle Fire HDX with Case and Keyboard – In the HECK YES Sexy by Nature Countdown Giveaway!

Posted by on Mar 5, 2014 in Blog | 9 comments

Enter TODAY to Win a Brand New Fully Stocked 32GB Kindle Fire HDX with Case and Keyboard – In the HECK YES Sexy by Nature Countdown Giveaway!



This giveaway has ended. The winner is Candy Horvath! Congratulations, Candy!!


Ladies what up!

Today I bring to you nothing other than fun and love:

I want to give you the best tablet of all time  – the Kindle Fire HDX – because… well.

I can. !!

And because Sexy by Nature is coming out in less than two weeks. (Party!)

And because the book is currently on sale at Amazon for $19.86, while the cover price is actually a full $27. That’ 27 percent off. (Party!!)

And because the Kindle Fire really is the best tablet of all time – I am an avowed user – despite all Mac hating and superiority complexes to the contrary.

(Please don’t hate me, Mac users. I still love you.)

SO. Go read about the Kindle if you want @ here. 

It’s 32 GB. (really I can’t afford the 64 and who needs that many gigs anyway? Unless you’ve downloaded seasons 1-9 of Scrubs… but in that case just let me know, and I’ll email the episodes over to you one at a time.)

It’s wi-fi connected (obvi).

It’s ad-free.

It’ll come with a fancy leather case, because who doesn’t want a fancy leather case?

It’ll also come with a brand new Bluetooth keyboard.

Neat, huh?

kindle fire



Entrance is easy peasy —

- just pick any (one, or two, or three, or all) of the options in the widget below. The raffle works by a point system, so the more you do, the better. But if you just want to do one, all the more power to you! There’s even a freebie for this audience since just about all of you like the paleo for women page on Facebook already.

If you’ve already pre-ordered the book, you can still pick the pre-order option! Just forward your pre-order receipt to me at And don’t forget the extra bonus: the special pre-order price of $19.86 on Amazon right now — that’s 23 percent off!

Wicked. Awesome.


a Rafflecopter giveaway

Why Danielle Walker’s Against All Grain is a Best Selling Cookbook and has 200,000+ Likes on Facebook

Posted by on Mar 5, 2014 in Blog | 1 comment

Why Danielle Walker’s Against All Grain is a Best Selling Cookbook and has 200,000+ Likes on Facebook


As I described in this post, I have recently decided to turn myself into someone who takes food more seriously. Sure, I have always eaten whole foods. But I have never really cared about how they are prepared. In fact, for my few first years of paleo eating I mostly ate raw or microwaved vegetables (unless someone else made them), canned fish, and avocadoes. Making tasty food just wasn’t worth the effort. What was important to me was the fact that I was eating.

This is one theme that I’ve found scattered among the lives of many disordered eaters I know. The fastest way to eat food is the best way, so some of us eschew the preparation process and go right for the goods. It’s almost as if the willpower to stay away from food falls out from under me and there is almost nothing left to keep me from eating once my feet have started moving toward the refrigerator.

So I confessed in the Nom Nom post that I want to impress some non-paleo dieters in my life with my mean cooking skills (hah!). That’s a real motivation. But it actually goes much deeper. As I move further and further away from restriction and my disordered past, I wonder: can I develop love for prepared meals? Can I have food in my life as a pleasure, rather than as a drug?

I do believe that I can.

So I picked my journey companions. I’ve got Michelle Tam on one side, and I’ve got Danielle Walker on the other. You already know why and how much I love Michelle’s work. What about Danielle?

Let me instead phrase it like this: What not about Danielle?


Danielle wrote and photographed everything in her whole NYT best-selling book, Against All Grain: Delectable Paleo Recipes to Eat Well & Feel Great. She has a toddler for whom she cares and of whom, of course, there are beautiful photos in the book. She is a brilliant writer and I enjoy her prose simply for its own sake. There is something delightfully simple and peaceful and loving and homey about her cooking, all the while with Danielle being a fiery spirit with a serious knack for beautiful food and beautiful photos.

aag family

(The credit for all photos in this post save the Finding Nemo and those taken on my phone, which you will definitely be able to distinguish, goes to Danielle at her site,

I want to quote the dust jacket to demonstrate to you just how pleasurable her writing is and to give you a preview of what’s inside:

“A self-trained chef, Danielle is the new face of grain-free cooking, tempting foodies of all stripes with her accessible recipes for vibrant Paleo food. Paying homage to the dishes she loved in her pre-Paleo life, she has ingeniously recreated all her favorites without grains or dairy in her first cookbook.

Complementing her innovating recipes with elegant photography, Danielle takes you on a culinary Paleo journey that includes everything from quick breakfasts to sinful desserts, with a long list of hearty entrees in between. And because Danielle knows she’s not the only one with a finicky toddler at home, she has included a special section filled with healthy recipes that kids will be eager to eat and moms will be eager to serve.”

In her introduction, she writes:

“As I began my culinary experimentations, I noticed a lack of recipes as well as personal accounts of setbacks and progress, and wanted to document my journey to help others. I decided to combine the power of my acquired culinary skills, my love for food, and my equal love for journalism and an all-out crusade, and started my blog, Against All Grain. I aimed to not only end my own suffering, but also to become a source of hope for others suffering from all types of diseases or allergies.”

So we have in Danielle’s book:

-a completely grain, soy, and dairy free cookbook. This is important. I need my food to be dairy free.

-innovative recipes that think outside the box

-new inventions as well as new methods for traditional dishes

-and a wide -perhaps the widest- array of types of meals to learn how to cook.

This final point is perhaps my favorite of them all.

There is a big debate in the paleo health scene about whether it’s okay to have “replacement” foods such as paleo cookies and pancakes. These foods are not ideal. No one who is being honest with themselves thinks so. These foods often include nut flours and have sugar in them and do not have super high nutrient density. They also may be addictive and highly caloric and therefore stymie weight maintenance efforts. But… well. So what? I say. YOLO.


(Internet speak for “you only live once.”)


Of course I am still going to eat mostly liver and vegetables and fruits and such – the real, hearty, nourishing paleo stuff. But I also know the world needs lightness and fun and love, so what’s the harm in knowing how to make the delectable sweet stuff?

Danielle delivers both kinds of food, and in spades.

Since in this book are:

-The “basics” (much as it was the case with Michelle’s book, and a big reason I love both of these books). Vinaigrettes, chutneys, barbecue sauce, ketchup, preserves, marinara sauce, pico de gallo, and chicken broth are all included.

-”the grain free kitchen and pantry” in which we learn all about almond flour and coconut products and the like.

-”to start off your morning” or, as I like to call, BREAKFAST, which includes (but there are twice as many in the book) smoked salmon eggs benedict, maple sage sausage with cinnamon apples, Spanish frittata with chorizo, pear-berry crisp, banana porridge, two kinds of granola, and coconut milk yogurt (I can’t wait to make this! I’m so tired of the Trader Joes and Whole Foods versions with 20 grams of sugar in them.)

-”small bites” which includes chicken satay, trail mix, rosemary-raisin crackers, sweet potatoes fries with wasabi aioli, and sweet potato chips. Mmmm.

-”soups, salads, and sides” which includes paleo clam chower (yes! definitely making that for my brother’s wedding), roasted butternut squash soup with sausage, warm spinach salad with bacon and mushrooms, coconut-lime rice, grilled artichokes with remoulade, and about fifteen others.

-28 main dishes (!), including thai pad see ew, fettuccini alfredo with blackened chicken, seafood, chorizo, and chicken paella, curried short ribs, carne asada burrito bowls, and honey-lime salmon toastadas.

-a section for kids foods like fruit roll ups, granola bars, honey graham crackers, and chicken tenders,

-a bread imitation section called “muffins, loaves, and morning cakes” that I literally cannot stop looking at. These “these can’t be paleo they look so good!” breads include both banana and zucchini bread, currant scones and rosemary scones, hamburger buns, peach streusel coffee cake, and “world-famous sandwich bread.” Um, yes, thank you. And when made out of coconut? Gotta love more variety in all my various coconut consumption habits.

-26 “sweets and treats,” OMG, with dishes like chocoalte layer cake, lemon meringue pie (I swear on my life last night I was wondering if any paleo people make lemon meringue pies… now I guess I will be one of them), black bottom banana cream pie, chocolate fudge sauce, seven-layer bars, and just about everything. Everything. I want Danielle to open a bakery.

-drinks in the section “sip on this” like mulled apple cider, berry-basil spritzer, and thai iced tea. Mm.

So there’s the whole range of paleo options, from the simple to the hearty to the fluffy and addictive, and I like that fact very, very much.


OH. No, wait, sorry, this is the best part: Danielle has a handy labelling system for every recipe in her book:

One yellow EF graphic for “egg free,”

a blue one with SCD for “specific carbohydrate diet,”

a red NF for “nut free,” (yayy! since I’m not a huge fan of nuts),

and a green V  for “vegan.”

Awesome. Even if you’re not a vegan yourself – as I am not myself – you may some day find yourself asked to participate in a vegan mac n cheese off, and while you might scoff, now perhaps you can blow them away, and with natural foods, too.


No, sorry, the best stuff’s still gotta be the recipes. Photos of some of which are included below. I took photos of my own with my phone to show you what they are like with the recipes in the book, and then I nabbed a few off of Danielle’s site so you can get a better idea of the real stellar quality of her stuff.

Phone photos (if you can’t tell I’m kind of a glutton for the baked goods):





IMG_20140304_124420_728 (1)


Against All Grain Blog photos:

aag recipe

aag recipe 2

aag recipe 3


So there you have it.

Danielle gives me everything I need for both a healthy grain and dairy free and nutrient dense kitchen, as well as the delight of her baking and her sweets and her photography…. with promises for joy and enjoyment I might be able to, over time, learn how to keep myself.


And, as always, in celebration of learning how to enjoy food, I’ve purchased another copy of Against All Grain to give away. Huzzah!

Entrance is easy peasy – just one click – choose one or more of the options below. Contest ends next Wednesday March 12 at midnight!

a Rafflecopter giveaway


And, as always, be sure to check out the blog post where I am giving away five free, pre-release copies of the women’s health manifesto Sexy by Nature: The Whole Foods Solution to Radiant Health, Lifelong Sex Appeal, and Soaring Confidence. 

And, Thursday March 6-Sunday March 16,I am giving away a brand new, fully-stocked 32 GB Kindle Fire HDX with a pristine Otter Box case (!). Here.



Get Adobe Flash player